Comments on: Why Don’t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives?

By: Princessa

Princessa — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 23:59:00 +0000

i have a jp bf right now and all i’ve read was true..you know sometimes if i want to make sex with him i make the first move but he refuses to do…oh my gosh…maybe its a culture..but i never ask why is he like that…imagine in a month we only have 3 sex how could that be…i love him very much and i never think about sneaking out to someone…

By: Milly

Milly — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 14:27:00 +0000

Someone should ask the women of Japan how they feel about this issue. Maybe they do not need kissing as a sign of appreciation and love and the other things their men do for them are perfectly showing them the affection and care they need. Things are expressed differently in different cultures and it’s not right for us to judge this way.

By: Interested

Interested — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 06:22:00 +0000

Well, how are/did things go?

By: samuel welsh

samuel welsh — Thu, 24 Mar 2011 07:09:08 +0000

all jp guys learn from the italians or divorce then let your wife marry an italian

By: Kawtar

Kawtar — Thu, 17 Feb 2011 23:51:47 +0000

hehe…dats very true…I love shy boys and I still don’t know what is the link between being shy and being attractive, but i can feel the link =) It’s there hehe ^^

By: Gaigin

Gaigin — Sun, 28 Nov 2010 04:18:57 +0000

I’m dating a Japanese woman here in the US have have dated her for three years. She said she was “serious” about me…but any outsider observing us in America would think our relationship is dead because of how void the romance is. There is no touching in public; maybe holding hands and he ‘might’ let me put my arm around her. Kissing? It’s like a sign of weakness to her. I don’t get it. It’s like they look down on it. When I’ve talked to her about it, it’s as if I have to explain things to her because she “just can’t understand”. Bull shit. The first year we were together, whenever we would leave to go home, she would be the one to come up and give me a kiss. She would always reach for my hand when we were walking in public, she would like to romance, etc., you know, like a normal woman. But after the first year, it like stoped. As for the sex, it’s just doesn’t exist. Hey ladies in Japan I have a message for you: Want to know why your man cheats on you? Take an intelligent geuss. BECAUSE YOU CHICKS GO COLD ON THEM! My girlfriend says she’s serious about me and that the relationship to her is beyond just the normal girlfriend-boyfriend deal. She’s considering marriage. Fortunatly, I happen to really love her too, otherwise I would not have put up with the for as long as I have. But I’ve been patient. Only because I can tell she is trying. I don’t think anything is being done on purpose to hurt me because I would have caught on to that a long time ago and ended the relationship…it comes down to cultural differences. Thats it. If you can work through those cultural issues and differences and both are willing to make the changes they need to make the relationship work; then it will work. But if one is putting in more effort than the other, consider it dead. If one doesn’t care anymore, then what’s the point? I haven’t addressed the romance thing with her yet. But if this continues into next year, I’m going to have to just tell her this isn’t working for me because love is missing. I’m a man that does not cheat. Once I marry, I want it to be the right woman and forever. I don’t want to devorce. But this also means she has to be capable of meeing my needs. And, I don’t require much for Christ sake. But I’m going to have to be prepared to accept that if she isn’t capable of meeting my needs as a man, then it’s just flat out not going to work and would have to end. I’d hate for that to happen. But I am being so patient and understanding for these differences. Japanese woman are beutiful. But they are a dime a dozen and you can get them at any time in Japan. But for marriage…hey guys. I’m a living proof of what the rumor is with Japanese woman: They go cold on you over time when it comes to romance. A Japanese wife may not be right for you if you want a normal romatic relationship with a wife. Just don’t expect it to happen. THE ONLY exception is if she is able to change her ways/views and be human in this very very basic way.

By: kaym

kaym — Mon, 09 Aug 2010 07:13:58 +0000

no,its not look bad…it just a culture…sometimes u have to understand other cultures n the way of they living…just like our culture, i am malaysian, n i am also a christian, but kissing, hugging with your partner in front of the public is a bad manner in our country…espcially when u do it in front of your parent or friends…uhhh…ones may say “please.. go back home n do it at your home”.

By: samuel welsh

samuel welsh — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 05:38:14 +0000

japanese guys are hopeless send them european girlfriends to wake them up

By: Morgan

Morgan — Wed, 19 May 2010 19:33:44 +0000

I’m English, and i find myself agreeing with Japanese men.

It would be nice if English men showed the same restraint. Just because they dont do it, doesnt mean they dont want to. The fact that kissing is reduced to less than once a day makes that kiss more special. When it does happen, it is more appretiated.

It’s also nice that they dont just rely on kisses to please their women. I see it as a shame that men think that a snog is the answer to every argument or disagreement, or a way to shut your girlfriend up, or a way to start sex.

I think the people of Japan are very wise, as most english girls will agree “we only want what we cant have” If we get something constantly we dont want it anymore.

I think that Japanese women must be very pleased when they recieve kisses!

By: toro

toro — Tue, 11 May 2010 05:02:36 +0000

And there’s a major sad lack of sexuality and humanity here period Mckenzie

By: toro

toro — Tue, 11 May 2010 04:45:06 +0000

Yup it’s very strange, in fact abnormal
golly it’s so very sad people here are very against having babies!

By: Mckenzie-chan

Mckenzie-chan — Mon, 10 May 2010 23:40:48 +0000

Its strange that japanese men dont kiss their wives a lot, but maybe they all have a secret reason! Like, they dont want it to be so crowed to they stop having a lot of kids!!! That way, their kids can live in a semi-non-crowded city!! Brilliant!!

But then. You take into consideration the amount of otakus, workaholics, busybodies, and long days, and it all makes sense.

By: toro

toro — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 16:03:23 +0000

birth rate boost, just be human it’s very scary that somehow it seems like we’ve really lost that.

By: andra

andra — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 13:33:58 +0000

if they dont kiss,they wont have the urge to have sex. do they agree on kissing,they discuss it 2 days prior to the date,so they are mentally prepared. Jesus! No kissing is like murder,its one of the best parts of having a relationship.

By: andra

andra — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 13:30:10 +0000

a kissing robot? that wont work,if theres no feel,no warmth,there is no way you could learn. they need an expert,a teacher in the art of kissing.if i think about it kissing is a bit complicated,you have to match the other persons rhythm,there are tricks (gently bitting,licking the lips etc..),i guess you need a good teacher and in the end a lot of experience.

By: delta steve

delta steve — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 04:02:05 +0000

Who knows why the Japanese don’t kiss? Who knows why the Japanese do or don’t do anything? Sometime in the 1980′s Japan went bat-shit crazy and they’re never coming back. But seriously though, there is a real demographic problem in Japan, maybe if they kissed more they would end up having more kids and solving that problem.

By: Kitty

Kitty — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 22:24:42 +0000

Where the heck! do you get your information from? That is a load of garbage. Have you ever seen a wood block painting or read the tale of Genji? They’re full of sexual relations (kissing and more). Kissing is not a foreign concept.

By: Kitty

Kitty — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 22:15:17 +0000

This is a personal attack and not a valid argument.

By: Kittu

Kittu — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 22:09:52 +0000

sorry Deas…I meant to respond to someone else. My mistake. ごめんなさい。

By: Kittu

Kittu — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 22:07:42 +0000

Geeze…apparently you take this personally. I’ve had a different experience however. I lived in Japan for 7 years and have been in relationships with Japanese men. Honestly speaking, as far as kissing Japanese men vs Western men…it’s all the same. More importantly, the ‘skill’ depends on the individual and has nothing to do with the culture. I did not have any ‘bad’ experience in Japan. In fact, they were quite enjoyable. And I agree, there are otherwise to show appreciation. However, I’d lole to point out that kissing wasn’t taboo or anything (for gods sake they have love hotels in Japan!). Public display on the other hand was frowned upon.

Perhaps the question could have been worded differently? Who gave this test by the way (company)? Who responded to it (how many more importantly) and what was the age group(s) or generation gap between participators? How long was each individual married for (2 years, 8 years, ect.)

These questions should also be considered before passing judgment.

Granted Japan needs to pick up ‘populating’ the nation, but this has nothing to do with this topic. It’s rather ridiculous and for those of us who have lived Japan understands this notion. It’s just another thread that allows Japan ‘bashing’ (a known concept in historiography since the 1970s). Before your criticize or pass judgment, understand the culture and nation. I.E. THE FACTS! You obviously can’t compare it to France. Western concepts do not translate fluidly. Just look at the Constitution of Japan. It makes perfect sense in English, but translated into Japanese it leaves a lot room for interpretation (i.e. article 9).

By: ¿Como se dan 0,56 besos en un día?

¿Como se dan 0,56 besos en un día? — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 21:50:20 +0000

[...] Mi pregunta no es los muchos o pocos besos que se dan las parejas en los diferentes paises de la imagen si no, ¿Como se puede conseguir dar 0,56 besos?… Vía Why Don’t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives? [...]

By: wallino

wallino — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 14:57:39 +0000

For me, to kiss is like to say: I’m yours!(too easy?) But maybe for the japanese culture this can be a serious problem…

By: Shari

Shari — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 14:45:21 +0000

You could say that except for the fact that this is a Japanese T.V. program saying “bad Japan”, not a western program. This has nothing to do with western notions about what is “good” or “bad”.

By: Truemors :: Smooch-less Japan

Truemors :: Smooch-less Japan — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 00:26:44 +0000

[...] Japanese TV show recently aired some intriguing statistics on how often married couples worldwide pucker up and Japan smooched in at second to last with a measly 0.56 kisses daily. The show decided to [...]

By: feitclub

feitclub — Sat, 29 Sep 2007 04:16:28 +0000

That explains why my wife never wants to make out when it’s that time of the month…

By: 4letterwords

4letterwords — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 23:17:27 +0000

My boyfriend claims that kissing mentally leads to sex in the Japanese mind, so unless they’re going to have sex, they don’t want to kiss.

Thats… fucking stupid.

By: Equalill.Com » Why Don’t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives?

Equalill.Com » Why Don’t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives? — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 17:21:48 +0000

[...] wrote an interesting post today on Why Donâ��t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives?Here’s a quick [...]

By: nama

nama — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:30:54 +0000

The kiss is propaganda of GHQ.

It is at 1945 that the culture that kissed entered Japan.
The kiss is one of the “Culture” that GHQ strongly advanced in Japan where it was
occupied after the defeat at WW2.

Cultural of Japan destruction was an aim. It was an aim to make it not recover twice.

By: Klauscore

Klauscore — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 02:50:16 +0000

The logical conclusion from these two news segments is to start the development of a kissing robot.

By: Amadou

Amadou — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 02:09:59 +0000

Why am I not surprised they followed the kissing with something random to pat themselves on the back? Japan will never change. By the way, Japanese people from what I remember, can be TERRIBLE kissers overall, think fish mouth with darting tongue back.
I’m not surprised they don’t do it, its cause they suck at it!

By: Deas

Deas — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 01:25:40 +0000

Did nobody else laugh at the typo? MARTIAL kissing? (I assume it was meant to be “marital.” But martial kissing…that sounds like it has a future in the Olympics. Spectators and participants would welcome it, I bet. Ha ha ha. Then again, it sounds kind of dangerous…

By: the overthinker

the overthinker — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 23:41:00 +0000

I’m surprised at China’s relatively high showing – nearly five times Japan’s rate, in fact. But aside from Brazil, known as a hotbed of hotness and passion anyway (Carnival), all the non-neighbour countries were Western with the Romantic tradition of slobbering all over your wife. What about places like Malawi, India, and Fiji?

By: James

James — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 21:34:38 +0000

It should be noted that:

-Japanese couples kiss all the time when they are dating. -Japanese TV dramas and movies also have kissing as a means of expressing love.

Kissing may be a cultural import from the west, but it’s still very present in the current Japanese idea of romance.

By: doinkies

doinkies — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 20:25:48 +0000

Yeah – that’s true for other East Asian cultures too. (China and Korea were 8 and 10 in that kissing poll for that matter.) They don’t tend to kiss a lot or make a big show of their affection, though perhaps younger generations are more likely to do those things than older generations.

By: Erika

Erika — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 19:09:35 +0000

Jeeeeez, not again with the ethnocentrism/western-centric stuff! It’s a CULTURAL difference. Does it mean that Japanese guys are passionless and cold? NO. Just because westerners express love through kissing doesn’t mean that people in other countries do too.

I’m of Japanese blood but I was raised here in the US, so there’s a lot of kissing in my relationship. Heh.

By: Nike

Nike — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 16:55:43 +0000

Its not the kiss what tells someone if he or she loves her or him.

By: Harvey

Harvey — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 15:47:51 +0000

I had a bit of reverse culture shock when I went to Paris for a stint after being in Japan for a few years. People were kissing all over the place, left and right! Have you no shame!? Ou’ lala, the humanity.

By: akky

akky — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 15:47:23 +0000

Hey, it is just which countries/cultures/religious values kissing more, isn’t it? That cannot be a good-or-bad issue.

Think about this. If middle-eastern and Russian people tell to you that your(male) not kissing your male friends much means lack of your friendlyness(or even humanity, etc.), do you agree with them?

By: ...

... — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 15:30:31 +0000

Those idiots who say that they should make up for the Japanese are not helping either.

By: Facewye.Com » Why Don’t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives?

Facewye.Com » Why Don’t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives? — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 14:56:05 +0000

[...] an interesting post today on Why Donâ��t Japanese Men Kiss Their Wives?Here’s a quick [...]

By: The Japanese Eye

The Japanese Eye — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 14:39:46 +0000

Not also do they not kiss their wives up there, but down there also remember this
http://mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp/waiwai/archive/news/2007/02/20070220p2g00m0dm023000c.html

By: Ken Y-N

Ken Y-N — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 14:25:03 +0000

Perhaps it’s that the wives don’t want to be kissed by stale fags’n'coffee breath?

By: D-san

D-san — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:52:26 +0000

I’ll kiss any of those kiss deprived Japanese wives out there!

You no longer have to suffer this travesty! Come to me!

By: feitclub

feitclub — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:33:12 +0000

While there are certainly plenty of ways to show/tell your spouse that you love them, what’s the case AGAINST kissing more often? It’s a simple gesture to make and, at least in my case, is one that I have always found to be extremely pleasurable.

Do any of the Japanese men suggest that they don’t want to kiss their wives?

By: thatguy

thatguy — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:31:34 +0000

Japan has way too much pride, so much where they think kissing their wives are considered not manly enough.

By: ...

... — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:00:13 +0000

In the other hand, I like shy Japanese girls. It makes them somehow more attractive.

By: Do Japanese men need to kiss their wives more? at The Yin Yang Report

Do Japanese men need to kiss their wives more? at The Yin Yang Report — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 12:56:28 +0000

[...] Japan Probe was the first to post this topic and had this to say about it: [The] foreign guys rip into Japanese men, stating that they are shocked that Japanese husbands do not kiss their wives more often. Surely if one has love and affection for one’s wife, one would at least kiss her once or twice a day! And what about expressing one’s appreciation for all the cooking and cleaning one’s wife does? They could not understand why Japanese couples kiss all the time before marriage, but after the wedding vows were exchanged, the kisses abruptly ended. Where’s the love?! [...]

By: j2

j2 — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 12:27:11 +0000

haha, the old guy in the robot clip looks like he’s thinking, “this isn’t something to be proud of you retards…” when everyone is cheering at the ranking. perhaps he understands the conundrum of low sex life, obsession with robots, and the biggest porn industry in the world.

By: Xylo

Xylo — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 11:35:18 +0000

I always assumed it was because they were cold and devoid of passion.
Hey, as the Japanese saying goes, “You don’t feed a fish after you’ve caught it.” (釣った魚に餌をやらない)。
I have a couple friends who are fake priests and occasionally they get requests from the couple before the wedding to omit the kiss at the end of the ceremony.
Sometimes shame outweighs love.

“The kissing segment of the show may have made Japan look a bit “bad,” but they followed it up with an international ranking of countries with the most robots. Sure enough, Japan won.”

lol